Let’s talk playdates. Once upon a time, think way back to when your baby was actually a baby…playdates were for us. While our bald, drooling darlings quietly stared at each other and swapped spit soaked toys, we talked. We could talk about anything without fear of them hearing. We had zero interruptions, minus the occasional diaper disasters, and it was wonderful. Coffee in hand, adult conversation flowing, the playdate scene was gold star material.
Then, they started crawling. The uninhibited talks continued, but sentences were left trailing as one of us ran after an over-exploring kid for the 867th time. Not quite as relaxing, but the ability to pour out and reciprocate mommy feelings and stories outweighed the stress.
Then, something changed. More kids came along, everyone got busier, it was harder to schedule and our free talks turned to spelling out words or strange mommy sign language so the kids wouldn’t overhear. It was like a crazy game of coffee charades. We both left feeling a little better, but also frazzled and a bit confused. Did she just tell me she’s pregnant again or did the baby have diarrhea? I have no idea…
Here’s the thing. Once school starts and sports start and life gets really, really, really busy… these playdates are even more important. Not just for the kids, sure they love playing together, but for us moms. We need each other, especially now.
Who cares if your fridge holds half a flat coke from Wendy’s, leftovers from last week and a jar of pickles. Invite me over anyway. I’ll be relieved about my moldy bread and sticky juice floors. Who cares if our kids are still in PJs, have sucker residue on their cheeks and will run and scream through the whole house. We can be thankful knowing they’ll sleep good later.
Don’t be concerned about the possible Lego avalanche that could hit me as I open the hall closet. I’ll be impressed you got the door shut. Pee in the toilet? No problem, we can laugh about how many times the kids don’t flush…or leave underwear in their pants in the hamper…or spill 867 cups of milk a week.
If we keep scheduling these dates for a time that seems perfect, they’ll never happen ..or not enough anyway. Let’s stop saying, we’ll play soon! Just text on a random summer Tuesday morning when you’re bored and the kids have hit record level crazy and you need a mama chat. I bet I’m in the same place. Who cares if you haven’t showered since Sunday and have Cheeto dust on your shirt. I guarantee that won’t hinder a true friendship conversation. You know I’m right.
So, Mama’s… get those playdates going. Don’t be scared, don’t wait until things are less crazy. Just do it. Afterall, it’s really for us too …and we could all use a little more coffee charades.